Holiday Burnout?
Illustration by Caroline Reedy/ @dootdoodles
Ever since I can remember, I’ve crashed mid-way through December. As a December Sagittarius and an observer of both Hanukkah and Christmas, the month is full of celebrations for me, and sometimes, it’s more than my introverted personality can take.
There was the office holiday party where I partook in a few too many Moscow Mules and came down with the world’s worst cold-virus-hangover the next day. There was the birthday I shared a slice of cake with a friend getting over a stomach bug and vomited for three straight days afterward. And almost every year, the seasonal depression hits hard, and I spent the last week of the month in bed, hiding from the world. I love December, but I hate December. As we approach the middle of the month, I smell impending burnout on the horizon. However, this year, I’m going to *try* doing it differently. I’m staying home this weekend and I endorse your decision to do the same.
If you’re anything like me, you might need a little support and guidance to get through this festive season. So let’s start with some FAQs about the ever-present “holiday party.”
Why is there always punch?
A few years ago, I realized it might be time for me and alcohol to consciously uncouple (blame it on the aforementioned Moscow Mules). I’m not totally sober, apparently, I’m Cali sober, but I promise you I’ll never speak those pretentious words out loud. Unfortunately, most social events I go to are far from alcohol-free, especially holiday parties. I get it - there’s something about Don, from HR, in his favorite Christmas sweater that just calls for something more exciting than water...which is why I love a mocktail!
This winter, I’m going crazy with a ginger ale, pear juice combo that makes me feel like the fanciest bitch at the ball. I’m also excited to make this Mango Vanilla recipe from Alison Wu’s blog. When I’m out on the town and don’t have access to my own personal mocktail kit, I like to bring a 6-pack of fun flavored seltzers for everyone to enjoy or ask the bartender to mix some fruit juice with sparkling water. If you’re throwing a holiday party this season, consider making your drinks more sober-inclusive by providing a mocktail that can double as a mixer.
Do you have to go to your office holiday party?
No, your employer can’t require you to attend a holiday party - that’s wage theft! They also can’t imply that you have to come, through distributing bonuses at said party. Here’s some advice on what to do if your employer schedules a party that conflicts with a religious holiday that you observe.
Who’s putting in the labor for your holiday events?
Whether it’s a holiday party at a friend’s apartment or your parents’ annual New Year’s Day shindig, take a moment to notice who’s taking the time to host, refill drinks, and clear dishes...and who’s sitting on the couch? Are gender or race dynamics at play? Here’s some more advice (also from the wonderful Daniel Ortberg) on how to deal with cis-men who don’t pitch in at holiday events.
How can you prioritize your needs without ghosting your friends?
There is a difference between flaking on a commitment and politely declining to attend. Look at your calendar for the coming month (you might need to take a deep breath when you realize we only have a few weeks left until the end of the decade) and think realistically about what you need to ring in the New Year feeling happy and healthy. Reach out to your friends in advance to respectfully cancel any commitments that will leave you feeling depleted. If you don’t do it now, you know you’ll be wishing you did during that post-shower, pre-party procrastination!
But, what about those events you can’t skip out on? Our team pitched in to share some tips on how they get through the holiday season:
Margaret, former book club manager, suggests watching some soothing food-related content. “I recommend watching Martha Stewart cooking with her mother - it’s really amazing! The tension! The hatred! beautiful dysfunction at play...But my actual recommendation is to watch chef Jon’s ‘food wishes’ YouTube channel and then try to cook some of the things - make your own food wishes come true!”
Luisa, our events staffer, gets crafty, “For me, it’s very relaxing to wrap presents or make hand made cards...I also stick with my favorite cousin and play music to distract myself from any crazy conversations.”
Sabrina, editorial director, recommends laughing it off. She says, “I try to get out of the house, take a walk if it’s not too cold and listen to a funny podcast. I’d recommend any of the Forever Dog podcasts like Seek Treatment, Las Culturistas, or A Woman’s Smile.” I can affirm that A Woman’s Smile is a great option if you want to pee your pants from laughing!
As for my recommendations? I’ll obviously be devouring Daniel Ortberg’s advice column and podcast, which I’ve now shouted out 3x (Daniel, get at me - big fan here). I’ll also be trying to make time for mindful movement because I’m like one of those tiny hyperactive dogs that get mean if it doesn’t get to run around. Check out some of my favorite inclusive and accessible fitness options in NYC, if you’re also looking for a movement-filled break from the festivities.
Oh, and if I forgot to mention it earlier - I’m not going to be able to make your holiday party this year. Maybe you can reschedule for March when I’m feeling ready to socialize again?
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Caroline Reedy is a Brooklyn based digital artist, who has been mixing comedy with pastel colors since 2016. Her work is mainly inspired by pop art portraiture, mental health advocacy, and internet culture. She has had her work featured on Overheard New York/LA, Link NYC, and Hello Tittie. Check out her work on her instagram at @doot_doodles.
Fiona Lowenstein (she/they) is the Founder and Events Director for Body Politic. They are a freelance writer, producer, and wellness practitioner based in NYC. Check out their work at fionalowenstein.com and follow them on Instagram at @fi_lowenstein for updates on their next yoga class, selfies, and dog content.
